This manzillian wax storytime is simultaneously the funniest and most cautionary tale on Herbistry420. Fordee’s manzillian wax experience from his 20s started with a Groupon deal, good intentions, and a desperate plan to win back his ex-girlfriend. It ended with excruciating pain, a canceled date, and the most hard-won lesson about doing things for the wrong reasons. Here’s the full manzillian wax storytime — with 5 things nobody warns you about before going through with it.
Manzillian Wax Storytime: How It Started
This manzillian wax storytime dates back to when Fordee was 26. He’d just broken up with a girlfriend of three years after a rough period of depression. To clear his head, he took his brother to Europe for a few months. When he came back, he wanted to patch things up with her. She agreed to a date — but set it two weeks out.
Two weeks to prepare. He bought new clothes. He planned to bring two dozen roses. And then, scrolling through Groupon, he spotted a deal for a manzillian wax experience. Why? He genuinely wasn’t sure. Some YOLO instinct. A theory that a “new him” would include this. He booked it.
5 Things Nobody Warns You About a Manzillian Wax
1. The Technician Will Not Be the Old Witch You Imagined
Walking in, Fordee had fully prepared for an old woman with a cauldron of wax and a mole with hairs on it. The actual technician for his brazilian wax for men first time was a very attractive 20-year-old. He was 26. His male waxing pain tips instinct immediately told him: this is worse. Tapping out in front of an old witch? No problem. Tapping out in front of someone you find attractive? Apparently impossible.
2. The Paper Thong Covers Nothing
They give you a paper thong for the manzillian wax experience. It’s about the width of a finger. It covers nothing. Everything is, in Fordee’s words, “just waving in the wind.” She ripped it off partway through anyway. He still doesn’t know what the thong was for.
3. The Pain Level Is Incomparable
Fordee trained martial arts. He’d been in street fights. He says nothing in his life had prepared him for the pain of the first wax strip being pulled — not a single fight, not a single injury. This is a key piece of manzillian wax what to expect intel: the first strip removes your dignity along with the hair.
4. Your Body Will Do Things You Cannot Control
The male waxing pain tips no one gives you: your body has opinions about this experience that have nothing to do with your brain. Fordee describes his body’s response as the same involuntary self-preservation reaction as getting into a very cold pool — and felt the immediate need to explain this to the technician. She did not care.
5. She Will Not Let You Quit
When Fordee tried to tap out mid-way through his manzillian wax experience, the technician challenged him directly. She questioned his toughness. She mentioned his mom. Lying on his back with his legs up, Fordee decided the argument was unwinnable from this position and let her continue. This is the core of manzillian wax what to expect: you will want to stop. You probably won’t.
The Twist Ending to This Brazilian Wax for Men First Time Story
Fordee survived his brazilian wax for men first time. He bought the new outfit. He had the two dozen roses. He was ready. And then she called — and canceled. She’d been dating someone else and changed her mind about the date.
Nobody saw the result of his manzillian wax storytime. Nobody knew. All that pain, all that vulnerability, all that effort — for nothing. He went back to being depressed for a while. He has never gotten a manzillian wax again.
Should You Get a Manzillian Wax?
According to Fordee’s manzillian wax experience: don’t do it impulsively for someone else. If you’re going to do it, do it because you want to. A Groupon deal and a desperate plan to win back an ex are not good reasons. Here’s the brutally honest manzillian wax what to expect breakdown:
- It will hurt more than you expect
- The paper thong is largely ceremonial
- The technician is a professional who has seen everything — you are not as unique as you think
- The male waxing pain tips you find online will not adequately prepare you
- It grows back
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a manzillian wax?
A manzillian wax (also called a Brozilian or male Brazilian) is a full pubic waxing treatment for men — the male equivalent of a Brazilian wax. It removes all or most of the hair in the pubic area. This manzillian wax storytime covers why it might not be the spontaneous decision Fordee thought it was.
How painful is a manzillian wax experience?
Very. Per Fordee’s firsthand account in this brazilian wax for men first time story — more painful than any fight he’d been in. The pubic area is one of the most sensitive parts of the body for waxing. Male waxing pain tips consistently advise taking a mild painkiller beforehand and avoiding the area right after a shower when skin is more sensitive.
What should you know about manzillian wax what to expect?
Key manzillian wax what to expect points: the procedure requires awkward positioning, full exposure, multiple strips over a sensitive area, and will likely take 20–30 minutes. You may want to stop. The technician will probably encourage you to continue. The result lasts 3–6 weeks before regrowth. Book it because YOU want to — not for someone else.
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