This toilet pipe review was a long time coming — Fordee ordered the cannabis toilet pipe from AliExpress on a whim, and it sat waiting for the perfect “crappy” day to test it. The verdict? It’s a toilet pipe in more ways than one. Here’s the complete breakdown of what this novelty stoner pipe is and whether it’s worth your money.
Toilet Pipe Review: What Is the Cannabis Toilet Pipe?
The cannabis toilet pipe is exactly what it sounds like — a miniature toilet-shaped smoking pipe made from ceramic or resin. It’s a novelty piece available on AliExpress and similar marketplaces, designed to look like a tiny toilet complete with a removable toilet seat lid and a detachable mouthpiece on the back. It’s compact, portable, and eye-catching. It’s also, as Fordee puts it, “the crappiest pipe ever.”
5 Reasons the Toilet Pipe Is a Gag Gift Only
After actually testing the toilet shaped pipe aliexpress style, here are the five honest reasons this pipe belongs in the gag gift category rather than your daily rotation:
- Confusing assembly out of the box. The mouthpiece arrives inserted into the body of the pipe in a way that makes it look broken. You have to push it out from the inside using a thin tool before you can screw it onto the back of the toilet body. The instruction design is non-intuitive — most people will think it arrived damaged.
- No screen included — herb falls through. The bowl opening at the top of the toilet has no screen. Ground herb falls straight through into the airpath during hits. You’d need to use a whole nugget or add your own screen to prevent losing material with every pull.
- The toilet pipe air leak is a real problem. There’s an air leak somewhere in the construction — you can see the flame barely being drawn toward the bowl when you try to light it. The hit is weak and unsatisfying compared to any standard pipe. Fordee tested covering the hole on top (which looks like a carb but isn’t) — it made zero difference to airflow.
- The “carb hole” isn’t a carb. There’s a hole on top of the pipe that logically looks like a carb. It’s not. Covering and uncovering it has no effect on the hit whatsoever. The pipe functionally has no carb.
- The toilet seat can fall while lighting. You need the toilet seat lid open to access the bowl. The lid doesn’t stay up securely on its own, which means you need one hand to hold the seat up while lighting with the other. It’s an extra juggling act for a sub-par hit.
How to Use the Toilet Shaped Pipe
Despite the drawbacks, here’s how to get the best possible hit out of a cannabis toilet pipe:
- Add a pipe screen to the bowl before packing. This prevents herb from falling through the hole.
- Use a whole small nugget rather than ground herb if you don’t have a screen — it stays in place better.
- Pack the bowl through the open toilet seat lid.
- Hold the toilet seat lid open with one hand while lighting from above with your other hand.
- Accept the hit is going to be mild and enjoy it for the novelty factor.
Is the Cannabis Toilet Pipe Worth Buying?
As a daily driver? Absolutely not. Fordee’s honest assessment: if he had a choice between the toilet pipe and an improvised apple pipe or potato pipe, he’d go with the improvised option every single time. The toilet pipe air leak alone kills any chance of it being a practical smoking device.
As a novelty stoner gag gift? That’s where this pipe shines. At its low AliExpress price point, it makes a hilarious gift for a cannabis-loving friend. The line writes itself: “I hope your weed isn’t as shitty as this pipe.” The look on someone’s face when they open it is genuinely funny, and if they can get a few laughs while trying to actually smoke from it, that’s bonus value.
Frequently Asked Questions
Does the cannabis toilet pipe actually work?
Technically yes — it will produce smoke. But due to the toilet pipe air leak and lack of a screen, hits are weak and herb falls through the bowl. It functions as a pipe, but very poorly compared to any standard glass or metal pipe.
Where can I buy the toilet pipe?
The cannabis toilet pipe is available on AliExpress. It’s inexpensive — the kind of novelty item you pick up without much financial risk. Check the link below for the exact pipe Fordee reviewed.
Is the hole on top of the toilet pipe a carb?
No. Despite looking like a carb, the hole on top of the toilet pipe has no effect on airflow when covered. It appears to be a design element rather than a functional carb. The pipe effectively has no carb.
Can I use ground herb in the toilet pipe?
Ground herb will fall through the unscreened bowl. Use a whole small nugget or add a pipe screen before packing if you want to avoid losing herb during your hit.
References
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